There comes a time in life where YOU WILL FEEL PRESSURE. That pressure can come in so many ways and from so many different things like friends, family, work or school. For many that pressure is either, again, a fight or flight situation where we either put it off or we just put our heads down and put in the work to get it over with. For example, a parent wanting you to take up a sport, some friends daring you to do something or something a little more formal like school or work asking you to get some things done in a specific time frame.
For me pressure, like you, comes in so many ways, but for me it comes a little more from a couple particular directions and sources. Work tends to be the biggest one that keeps throwing things on my way with challenges like getting things approved by clients and also sticking to a good schedule with the workloads that keep on coming my way. And mind you there’s also work that is my own like side gigs and hustles that also take a big chunk of my time.
Coordinating and getting things done for my personal things is kind of hard when I try to get them done in the evenings or past 12:00am. So yeah, there is pressure to get some of those mixed in with my daily work as well as trying to continue to stay active because I have had to give up my sport, which I really enjoyed as it was a medium for me to get rid of that extra energy that came from frustrations and anger.
Another thing is the pressure of expectations from me, my peers, my family, my girlfriend, my responsibilities, and the future. And this is what keeps the pressure one hunnid and just adds that cherry on top for that stress milkshake as I am a person who abnormally worries about the future quite a bit. For example, always trying to have some cash on me in case of emergencies and also being worried about what I will do, job-wise, in the future. Some of the deeper and darker questions that keep me up at night is also what will I do if someone dies on me, someone close of course. That has to be one of the biggest worries that keeps my thoughts running. Because 1. death is inevitable and 2. death, caused by humans, has been on the rise and does not look like it is going to slow down one bit.
And just to share one last bit that is quite complex, but I will try to simplify it a tad is me. Me in the terms of having this big shadow that has been cast over me and if there is any possibility for me to grow bigger and then cast my own larger shadow. Another way to put is that the shoes that I have to fill are quite large. And another part of that stress is how will I keep myself once I have to fend for myself or once I decide that I do not want to take any of the proceeds of where I work, but depending on the ones that I am currently starting. Because I know that eventually once I go that path, later on in life, I will have to be a provider for my family and my own family down the line.
I am not taking this with the macho perspective that many people have, but because no one ever knows what will happen. To add to that, being a single child and growing up that way has always kept me with a lone ranger and survivor mentality. So what I normally do is just put my head down and keep on working until I get to chop one thing at a time. Sometimes its as easy as keeping one foot in front of another and just going like that. Or from a podcast I enjoy listening to once mentioned it is just about getting up and out there and just showing up. Once you show up, its a different energy and a different mentality because half of the work is done and it is up to you to get the rest done. Sometimes it is just better to take a small breather (no matter how rushed you may be) because it will give you that little bump in strength and dexterity to be able to sort things out and get to where you need to be.
It is okay to feel that way and just keep on pushing forwards. Here’s a small thing of mine, quotes.
-The journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step.
-If you can’t fly then run, if you can’t run then walk, if you can’t walk then crawl, but whatever you do you have to keep moving forward.
Hang on tight and remember that tomorrow is another day. Just keep things a day at a time. (This one saying is from the N.A. meets.)
So yeah, that is today’s share of myself. Sometimes I can relate to an onion because of the layers I have kept ever since I was small, think of it kind of like a defense mechanism or something like thick skin over thick skin over thicker skin.
Hope you liked this post and looking forward to share more.
A Billion Little Pieces 